Let’s Pretend…About Love, more

Walking home you are trying to put all the pieces together. It is exhilarating that you found out what L.O.V.E. is but there seems to be something missing. Just then you are hit, hard, by a basketball.  Continue reading “Let’s Pretend…About Love, more”

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Let’s pretend…About Love (cont.)

“What do I know about love?” as you question your new role. Weeks go by and you attempt to write down your thoughts. You try writing a blog about love and post about love on Facebook. You think this will help clarify your thoughts and begin to get the word out about love. Continue reading “Let’s pretend…About Love (cont.)”

Love In The Eyes Of A Child

When she gazes up at me, bending her head back for maximum view of what must be to her a giant of a man, her hair falls back away from her face, revealing those limpid pools, deep as clear mountain lakes, oversized for her child face, begging me to dive into her heart to love her. I am swept off my feet and I fall in.

He stealthily wraps his arm around my neck as I sit at my desk momentarily disabling me and suddenly whirls around to reveal his ear to ear smile as if to say “I captured you!” His eyebrow exaggeratedly pushed up crinkling his blemish free forehead accentuating those rounded ovals guarded by long lashes declaring loving warm familial devotion.

No doubt you have seen it; love in the eyes of a child. Oh the way that it makes me feel! I am more than alive, I am sated in the deepest part of my inner being. My reason for existing, the quest of my life, complete meaning and satisfaction is, for that moment, accomplished. It is Nirvana.

What is it about love in the eyes of a child that make me feel so? Is it the total acceptance? The unconditional love and devotion? Yes and yes, but more. Is it that such innocence has found me worthy. That I might be the center of a child’s fantasy? Yes and yes, but more. Is it that I, among all the billions, am recognized as unique and supremely special? Yes and yes, but more. Is it that hope for the future and raw potential leadership respects me? Yes and yes, but more. Is it the free exchange of love and deep connecting? Yes and yes and more.

It is miracle of life being born again inside me. I am in the child and she is in me. I have forgotten about the miracle of life. The child’s love enlivens it. It was relegated to an inferior place in my mind, there behind the super rational part, behind the “priorities” and “important” aspects of my full and busy life. His love transforms me back to who I really am in the universe, these many decades later, it transforms me to my original state. Yes I am a child too, I am full of love and fun and freedom and discovery. I, too, can give acceptance, love, devotion and find others worthy, unique, special and give hope to those who need it so much. I didn’t know I needed it until I saw love in the eyes of a child. I am sure that millions and billions of other don’t know or have forgotten, too.

Love in the eyes of a child reminds me of my purpose here; to reflect love as others see me and empower them to be everything that God wants them to be.

Love Voices In Your Head

Schizophrenia is an awful crazy making disease. It is frequently associated with hearing competing voices with confusing and alarming messages. But everyone hears voices. Some even say that there are two (or more) brains inside us challenging the commonly held idea that our Self is a unitary autonomous being guided with singular authority. There may be committee or community of voices helping the predominate you by giving unconscious and conscious direction to your life.

One of your voices may be your self critical voice. She/he is constantly reminding you of your real and fabricated limits. “You’re not smart enough.” “You can’t do that.” “Why would they listen to you?” “You’re not very pretty.” There may be an element of truth in the self critical voice but it is always exaggerated, self limiting and not rational. My response to “You’re not smart enough” is “There are many people smarter than I am, but I am smart enough, and smart enough to get help if I need it.”

I enjoy the voices from my loved ones living inside me. I hear my Grandmother’s voice loving me. She is always positive and encouraging. Along with her voice I feel the warmth of her love, her acceptance. It is beautiful. My Father’s voice is positive to me (but not so much for my brother, I think). After he passed away he would visit me in my dreams. His voice is rational and affirming. Once I had a personal crisis and he met me at a dream restaurant and sat with me and gave me guidance. God speaks to me also with wisdom, compassion and love.

In dark times I summons my rational voice to help me. He lives in the prefrontal lobe of my neocortex. These dark times are when the primitive part of my brain, the fearful part which secretes chemicals and hormones that negatively affect my thinking kicks in with irrational thoughts. My rational self challenges the irrational thoughts. “No, your whole world as you know it is not coming to an end. There will be some changes. Everybody has changes. You have had changes before. You will survive this change. It may even turn out better for you.” I love my rational voice even if he is Spock-like and not very emotional.

Unfortunately you don’t know what voices are in other people. If you did know then you could judge them. But since you don’t know you have to give them grace, stay curious, and try to understand. If you let them talk with you then you can discern the voices and love them better.

The Love voices are the most powerful voices. In addition to grace, peace, kindness and all the positive qualities of Love, Love voices also challenge, stretch, and causes you to grow beyond what you thought possible. The Love voices provide discipline and accountability. Love voices empower people to be everything they can possibly be in the world.

Here is some good news; you have some control over the voices in your head. My advice is to listen to the Love voices.